Certain Songs

Certain Songs #1636: Pretenders – “Porcelain”

September 18, 2019 by Jim Connelly Leave a Comment

Album: Extended Play EP
Year: 1981

. . .

And then there’s “Porcelain,” maybe the weirdest track that the original incarnation of the Pretenders ever recorded. It’s basically a three-part song, each section distinct from the others, that somehow all fits together.

At first it comes roaring out of the gate, with James Honeyman-Scott stealing and inverting the riff from the Rolling Stones “The Last Time” over a whalloping Martin Chambers drumbeat that occasionally stops to gather breath, then takes off again. This goes on for such a long time that you kinda assume that “Porcelain” is an instrumental like “Space Invader” until it suddenly shifts directions, Chambers downshifting into an almost-reggae rhythm, all kick drum and rim hits, while Pete Farndon plays a hypnotically circular bass riff.

Certain Songs #1635: Pretenders – “Message of Love”

September 17, 2019 by Jim Connelly Leave a Comment

Album: Extended Play EP
Year: 1981

. . .

I guess that Sire Records decided to lead off Extended Play with “Message of Love” because it was the most recent single in the U.K., or maybe because it was both the most recent single and a bit more of an uptempo song than “Talk of the Town.” In any event, way back in 1981, “Message of Love” was the first thing I’d heard by Pretenders after the debut, and it pretty much slayed me.

And why not? “Message of Love” is a big glam-rock stomper, featuring a massive tom-laden drum beat from Martin Chambers, and an arrangement that was cooked up in the studio rather than brought to the band by Hynde. And, of course, the lyrics are great.

Certain Songs #1634: Pretenders – “Cuban Slide”

September 16, 2019 by Jim Connelly Leave a Comment

Album: Extended Play EP
Year: 1980

. . .

Because the mood is light-hearted, the beat Bo Diddley and the lyrics relatively low-stakes, “Cuban Slide” often gets dismissed as a lightweight song, suitable for a b-side or a stopgap EP, but that’s about it.

But those are all the reasons I love it, of course. “Cuban Slide” isn’t a major Pretenders song by any stretch of the imagination, but on the other hand it’s the sound of a great band loosening up and having fun with a specific musical style. Also, I’ve fucking love the Bo Diddley beat, especially when it’s driven by a tremolo-laden rhythm guitar, which is what Chrissie Hynde kicks off the song with over a tom-filled Martin Chambers rhythm.

Certain Songs #1633: Pretenders – “Talk of the Town”

September 15, 2019 by Jim Connelly Leave a Comment

Album: Extended Play EP
Year: 1980

. . .

In 1980 and 1981, Pretenders released two world-beating singles in the U.K.: “Talk of the Town” b/w “Cuban Slide” and “Message of Love” b/w “Porcelain.” All four songs — plus a smokin’ live version of “Precious” — were released on an EP called Extended Play in the spring of 1981.

And it killed me. Dead. To the point where I’m pretty sure that Pretenders were my favorite band in the world that spring and early summer. Or least up until the point where Pretenders II came out. But we’ll talk about that soon enough. First, lets talk about the songs on an EP that I treasure as much as Chronic Town or The Cost of Living EP, leading off with this incredible single, a pure pop confection as good as anything Hynde ever wrote.

Certain Songs #1632: Pretenders – “Mystery Achievement”

September 13, 2019 by Jim Connelly Leave a Comment

Album: Pretenders
Year: 1980

Like London Calling, Pretenders came out in the U.K. in 1979 and here in the U.S. in 1980. So while it’s technically a 1979 album, all of its impact — however you define that slippery term — came in 1980. Therefore, like London Calling, I really think of it as the first of the great albums of the 1980s, not the last of the great albums of the 1970s.

Which made sense: while both albums couldn’t have existed without punk rock, both albums were also signposts towards what was going to happen after punk rock, as punk rock became just one more bit of musical history upon which to draw upon when creating a sound.

Certain Songs #1631: Pretenders – “Brass in Pocket”

September 12, 2019 by Jim Connelly Leave a Comment

Album: Pretenders
Year: 1979

. . .

While side one of Pretenders bowled me over, up to and including the Nick Lowe-produced wall of sound take on The Kinks, I was initially more skeptical of side two, which after the pure-pop of “Kid” featured their takes on Reggae, Soul and even a proto-power ballad before finally rocking out one last time. So while I often played side two to get that last song (about which more tomorrow), when it came time to put these songs on a cassette for driving purposes, most of them got left off.

Including the massive hit single, which 1980 Jim enjoyed, but didn’t love, possibly because it was on the radio all the time. So it’s only over time that I have come to appreciate what a great song “Brass in Pocket” truly is.

Certain Songs #1630: Pretenders – “The Wait”

September 11, 2019 by Jim Connelly Leave a Comment

Album: Pretenders
Year: 1979

. . .

After the complicated stomp of “Tattooed Love Boys,” side one of Pretenders went in a different direction, a slow instrumental with double entendre title of “Space Invader,” ostensibly named after a very popular arcade game of the time, highlighted by a big, rumbly Pete Farndon bass and out-of-nowhere guitar outbursts from James Honeyman-Scott that I absolutely loved.

At the fade, they brought in some of the actual noises from the Space Invaders arcade game, which segued instantly to what might be my favorite song on Pretenders, the utterly incandescent “The Wait,” one of most exciting rock ‘n’ roll songs that anybody has ever performed.

Certain Songs #1629: Pretenders – “Tattooed Love Boys”

September 10, 2019 by Jim Connelly Leave a Comment

Album: Pretenders
Year: 1979

. . .

A Story Which Is True Until It Isn’t.

It’s November, 1987 and both James Honeyman-Scott and Pete Farndon have been dead for a half-decade, as Chrissie Hynde and Martin Chambers have carried on under the Pretenders banner, making one record that was pretty great and one that wasn’t.

Anyways, none of that mattered to a largish swath of our little tribe as we watched the Pretenders open for U2 — the climax of my 25th birthday weekend — at the massive Alameda County Coliseum, long-time home of the Oakland Athletics and off and on home of Oakland Raiders, because Chrissie Hynde had recruited a lead guitarist who was at least the equal and probably the better of Scott, one Johnny Marr, still fresh from the breakup of the mighty Smiths.

Certain Songs #1628: Pretenders – “Up The Neck”

September 9, 2019 by Jim Connelly Leave a Comment

Album: Pretenders
Year: 1979

The second track of Pretenders was “The Phone Call,” which wed a pair of insistent guitar riffs, a weird drum pattern and processed vocals to create a wholly off-kilter experience, which, after “Precious,” felt like a bit of a left turn, but also set up a theme for the whole album: each track was going to be different than the previous one.

Certain Songs #1627: Pretenders – “Precious”

September 8, 2019 by Jim Connelly Leave a Comment

Album: Pretenders
Year: 1979

. . .

How do you talk about a thing that changed your life? Because, surely, that’s what side one of Pretenders did for me.

Here’s the thing: I came of musical age in the mid-1970s, one of the most sexist and racist moments in rock music history. At the time, it was received wisdom that only white dudes with guitars knew how to make quality rock and roll. There were, of course, exceptions to that cant — most notably Jimi Hendrix and Janis Joplin, both of whom died too young to have the world turn on them — but by and large, that’s just how it was.